Some parents are lucky enough to have family close by, grandparents ready and waiting to whisk the kids off for a weekend while their parents luxuriate in the quiet of a child-free home. Others of us are not so lucky and require a babysitter for even the smallest time alone. But with a little creativity we can get that much needed personal time with a significant other, even without hiring a babysitter, or involving nosy neighbors or investigative reporters. Here are a few dos and don’ts for sneaking in a few moments of alone time together:
Do
Try to spend a few moments together while the kids are at their activities. A parent doesn’t need to watch each and every soccer practice or ballet class. Most parents have taken this time for an occasional quick trip to the grocery store or other errand anyway. Why not spend a little of that time with your spouse?
Don’t
Don’t forget to pick up your child!
Do
Use TV for a babysitter but use it judiciously. Most children watch some TV each week. Why not take advantage? Try to save your child’s TV time for when both you and your spouse will be home together.
Don’t
Don’t leave your child unattended in front of the TV for several hours. There is a limit for ignoring your child, and skipped meals may be cause for concern.
Do
Hit the gym. Many gyms offer free child care as part of their services. Take them up on it and meet your spouse for a game of basketball, spotting each other on weights or taking an aerobics class together.
Don’t
Don’t hide out in the locker room reading a magazine. Just kidding! You can hide out in the locker room reading a magazine if you want. After all, you’ve already paid the gym membership!
Do
Reinstate nap time. Even children too old to nap can take advantage of a scheduled rest time. Treat it with the same routine as you do bedtime. Then let your children know that it’s fine to play or read quietly in their rooms as long as they only come out for a trip to the bathroom.
Don’t
Don’t forget to let them know when they can come out of their bedrooms.
Do
Do try to meet your spouse for lunch to grab a few quick moments together.
Don’t
If you are a stay-at-home parent, don’t abandon infants in favor of a lunch date. Soon these babies will be in school and this option will be yours for the taking!
Do
Enjoy an early breakfast together on the weekend. If you’re not too sleep deprived, try waking up extra early one weekend morning and indulging in a child-free breakfast.
Don’t
Don’t make too much noise. Some children seem to have a sixth sense about when their parents wake up and even tiptoeing around the kitchen might set off their ESP. In fact, breakfast out on the patio might be what nabs you the most free time.
Do
Take advantage of “Kids Night Out” programs. These are often run by activity or community centers or churches. Hours will vary but these usually have fun activities occasionally scheduled for children.
Don’t
Leave your kid with total strangers. Do your research: Get to know the location and ask for recommendations before dropping your child off.
By following these simple tips, you too can gain some alone time with your spouse. Be sure to follow only the dos and not the don’ts to create a healthy environment for your marriage.
Jill Morgenstern is a mother to four. She has over 20 years of teaching experience in various settings and a master’s degree in teaching reading.
