Bringing a new life into the world is a magical and challenging experience. A postpartum doula can be your partner in navigating many of those magical moments and their challenges. As a doula myself, I’ve had the privilege of supporting countless families during this tender time. Today, let’s explore the diverse world of postpartum doulas, and how you can find the perfect match for your unique needs.
Understanding the Role of a Postpartum Doula
Before diving into the search for your perfect doula, it is important to understand what a postpartum doula does. First and foremost, postpartum doulas focus on the family, providing emotional, physical, informational and sometimes spiritual support to new and experienced parents during the postpartum period. Unlike night or baby nurses, who focus their support on caring for just the baby, postpartum doulas focus on the holistic wellness of the birthing parent and their baby, as well as their partner and older children, if any. We assist with newborn care and feeding (body and bottle); offer evidence-based guidance on newborn growth, soothing, and development, as well as the parent’s postpartum recovery and self-care; and take care of light household chores, including meals and laundry, so the birthing parent and baby can rest and bond. We also have wonderful connections in our community of providers for issues that are beyond our training or experience, or if a family needs a specific referral.
If you are unsure as to whether or not you need a postpartum doula, check out this article from Parents magazine or the American Pregnancy Association website. They walk you through all the essentials of postpartum doula care, from our scope of practice and services to the benefits of our care and estimated costs.
Identifying Your Needs
Each family is unique, and so are their postpartum needs. Take some time to reflect on what type of support you’re looking for. (If you are looking forward to your first postpartum and unsure, here is a short article on what to really expect.) Are you seeking someone with a nurturing and gentle approach, or do you prefer a more structured and organized postpartum doula? Consider your parenting philosophy, cultural preferences and any specific challenges you anticipate.
Meeting Your Needs: Characteristics of Postpartum Doulas
Doulas, like other human beings, are multifaceted. However, between personality and professional philosophy, an individual doula might demonstrate more of one or some of the following characteristics.
The doula who prioritizes nurturing, for example, typically prioritizes emotional support, and is ideal for a birthing parent/family who seeks a warm comforting presence and an empathetic ear more than practical support and skills. The “organizer,” on the other hand, is the perfect doula for a birthing parent/family eager to set schedules, bringing the structure and efficiency needed to create routines and order during the early postpartum chaos. The educator is not only knowledgeable but also passionate about sharing their knowledge. This doula is well matched in a family with an equal thirst for knowledge – on all things baby-related! Finally, the flexible doula is adaptable, easy and happy to “go with the flow” or “roll with it.” A birthing parent/family with unpredictable needs and schedules, or comfortable with more laid-back support, wants this doula.
Interviewing Doulas
Interviewing postpartum doulas is a crucial first step in finding the right match for your family. (Here is a great podcast on interviewing doulas from Nessle.com to get started.)
Additionally, here are some questions to help you get to know the doula and assess whether their approach aligns with your needs:
Background:
- How long have you been working as a doula?
- What experiences bring/brought you to this profession?
- Can you share some experiences you’ve had working with families like ours?
Approach:
- What is your philosophy when it comes to supporting families during the postpartum period?
- How do you balance between providing support and encouraging independence for new parents?
- How do you tailor your support to meet the unique needs of each family?
- How comfortable are you working with families from diverse cultural backgrounds? Can you share some examples of families you have supported that have traditions different from your own, and what you might have learned from those experiences?
Support Offered:
- Do you have any further training in specific areas such as lactation, newborn sleep or emotional complications that are typical after birth and during postpartum?
- Can you provide examples of tasks or activities you typically assist with?
- Are there certain tasks or activities that you are unable or unwilling to do?
- How do you provide information and resources to help parents feel more confident in caring for their newborn?
- Have you worked with families who faced similar challenges to ours?
I also encourage you to share some information about your family during this conversation. You can make it as personal as you like, from the idiosyncrasies of family pets and what parking will be like for your doula when they come to visit to the unique personalities of your family members, including older children. Speaking of siblings, HealthyChildren’s article on preparing older children for life with a newborn, is a useful resource for your “keep me up at night” concerns about their adjustment to a new baby.
The goal of the conversation with a potential doula is to gather information about the doula’s experience, approach and compatibility with your family. Remember to trust your instincts and choose a doula with whom you (think you will) feel comfortable during an intimate and vulnerable time for you and your family. Finding the right postpartum doula is a personal journey. It’s about aligning not only with the skills and expertise of the doula but also with their personality and approach, and a personal connection even at this early stage can be reassuring and helpful. At the same time, we understand that adjustments will need to be made as the postpartum period and recovery journey unfold. Postpartum doulas are skilled in being flexible, preempting parents’ needs and meeting parents where they are on their changing journeys.
Finally, take the time to explore the diverse world of postpartum doulas by talking to more than one of us. Your doula wants you to have the best care possible for your family, so know that it is okay to give yourself options and the opportunity to change your mind because there is a postpartum doula for your family out there, ready to offer the support and care you need and deserve.
Banger Bansal (they/he) is a doula and reproductive care provider who is invested in offering accessible and community-based care services. Banger is also a member of the team at Metropolitan Doulas, a postpartum doula agency that serves Washington DC, Maryland and Northern Virginia.
