The holidays are coming–just as you were beginning to relax after your kids seemed to be mastering the school routines. The holidays are exciting and fun, but they can also be disruptive. However, with some forethought into your children's sensory disposition, you may avert some of those holiday meltdowns.

We all react to sensory stimuli differently. Often, one or more senses is more acute than the others. While this can be a strength, it can also be hard to manage. Smells that barely register with some of us can make others almost queasy. Summer heat and humidity sap some people's energy while others feel invigorated. You may not have thought about how you react to sensory stimuli. Adults have often learned coping mechanisms to lessen their exposure to uncomfortable situations. Take a few minutes to think about how you, your spouse and your children react to challenges to your senses.

The senses include those that we think of immediately: tactile (touch), visual (sight), auditory (hearing) and olfactory (smell), as well as the lesser recognized vestibular and proprioceptive senses. The vestibular sense is our body's response to gravity and our sense of balance and body position. The proprioceptive sense is the information coming through our joints and muscles about where our body is in space.

Tactile

Let's start with the sense of touch. Do you have a child who is comfortable only in certain clothes, finds labels scratchy or complains about the seams in socks? If so, you may anticipate struggles getting that child into holiday clothes or the darling outfit that grandma sent. Dress shoes, tights or stockings, boys' ties and dress shirts can make your children irritable just when you are asking them to show their calmest behavior. Children may still be struggling with wearing heavier clothes now that the weather is colder. Bustling shoppers may bump into your child in crowded malls, making a tactile-sensitive child claustrophobic.

Temperature also affects us. This is the air "touching" our skin. The heat has been turned on, and rooms can be too hot and stuffy. Or children may be comfortable in the warmth but the transition from indoors to outdoors may be jarring. Some people have a very narrow range of temperatures in which they feel comfortable. When our bodies feel too hot or too cool, we often get edgy and irritable.

Vision

Fall foliage, winter frost or snow and holiday decorations make this a pretty time of year. However, there can be too much of a good thing. All the decorations and lights can be overstimulating. Our eyes can glaze over and find it hard to focus with all the colors and light. Familiar places may look different with the addition of decorations or because the leaves have fallen off the trees.

Auditory

The holidays are full of sounds and noises. Sounds pop up everywhere, from the Salvation Army bell ringer to holiday music to blaring horns and yelling voices of hassled shoppers. Too much noise can put many of us on edge. We may not realize that the mounting noise level triggers our headache and tense shoulders. On a more subtle level, the voices of visitors and many people crammed into your house may affect some children. At the other end of the spectrum, your children may like loud music, talk loudly and make lots of noise themselves. If you are visiting grandparents who like quiet, you may find yourself stressed in your efforts to tone down your children.

Olfactory

This is certainly the time of year for smells, ranging from the crisp air to musty fallen leaves to sweet smells of cookies and candy. For many of us, all the yummy smells are a treat. Thanksgiving dinner with turkey, vegetables and pies is a cacophony of olfactory whiffs. Once again for some children, it can just be too much. As wonderful as the smells are, they may be different than what a child is accustomed to and overwhelming. And while we're mentioning food, the erratic eating schedules of the holidays can create the discomfort of being too hungry or too full.

Vestibular and Proprioceptive

Initially, these senses may not seem to be particularly challenged during the holidays, since they reflect our response to gravity and how we move our bodies through space. But think, how does your child react to the motion of traveling by car, plane, etc.? The motion affects our vestibular system, so traveling may be disturbing. If you have a child who craves motion and careens around your house, visiting someone unaccustomed to such behavior may create tension. Our comfort level is linked to the ease with which we maneuver our bodies. Strange surroundings may make your child less comfortable, merely because she is nervous about finding her way around new spaces. Those crowded malls with escalators and elevators elicit fear in some children.

What Can Help?

Acknowledge that your children may really be uncomfortable, uneasy or overwhelmed. Ask them what is bothering them. Sometimes children won't know, but surprisingly often they can tell you specifically. Enlist their cooperation and ideas by letting them have some input. For instance, explain that dressy occasions are coming, and you expect your child to look nice like everyone else. Ask your children for ideas about what would make their fancy clothes more comfortable. Could your daughter stand the fancy dress if she doesn't have to wear tights? Maybe you can find some comfortable dressy shoes. If Grandma is receptive, guide her toward selecting gifts in the styles your child likes.

If you will be traveling and visiting other families, think ahead about your hosts and how your family can adapt to different surroundings. Merely recognizing that the noise or new surroundings are bothering your child can lead to more acceptance and some amount of adaptation. There will be sensory overload situations that you can't control, so some empathetic encouragement of your child's attempts in trying to cope may be the best you can do. Sensory overload is not an excuse for bad behavior, but understanding the trigger may prevent a repeat. You can also tailor the consequence of bad behavior to teaching a positive coping skill.

So as the holidays approach, think ahead. If you are visiting relatives, think of anything they do differently that will affect your children's routines. Organize clothes early, so dressing for Thanksgiving or that fancy holiday dinner doesn't dissolve into a temper tantrum. Be mindful of the sights, sounds and smells that surround your children.

Gail Troussoff Marks is the preschool and special needs director at Silver Stars Gymnastics and the mother of two U.S.A.G. competitive gymnasts. With her strong concentration in sensory integration, she believes that movement and motor planning are keys to a child's well-being.